She's A Flower In A Wasteland
Who is SHE?
She is a Christian woman who has been through all of the twists and turns of the roller coaster we like to call life. She has been “to hell and back” living through anxiety, depression, grief, shame, you name it. She is a survivor, thriver, warrior and flower. She’s as delicate as rose petals and as strong as a storm.
But she knows it all comes from the Lord. For no matter all of the valleys and dark depths she has ventured, the Lord pulled her out every time; He never let her drown.
What is the WASTELAND?
The wasteland could be the emptiness of her own soul – as she pulls away from the Lord. It could be the wasteland of lost souls of the world (where she feels like the only Christian, all alone). It could be a physical wasteland as she finds herself sheltered and withdrawn from society.
But no matter what the wasteland is… The Lord will find her there and He will pull her out.
She’s a flower in a wasteland.
She stands unbothered and strong.
To The Women Struggling To Breathe
Though it can feel like a wasteland of lost souls, and you’re the only flower blooming all alone, you are not alone in the world. God is ALWAYS with you.
There are moments of despair and hopelessness and sorrow and grief in every believers life. Those moments cause us to question our beliefs and either weaken or strengthen our faith. Sometimes both happens. Sometimes our faith weakens and we fall into the traps of the devil; we sin and break into pieces. AND THEN, at rock bottom, in the pit of death, our faith …
We – Christian women – are like roses: we grow thorns to protect ourselves against being hurt by others. But fail to realize, that as much as those thorns protect us from evil or mean or toxic people, they also keep us from nice people with pure hearts. Those thorns also turn us a little mean because we’re hiding so much in fear of being hurt, that sometimes we might just do the hurting. We might become the monsters we fear the most…
It’s interesting how a bad moment in your life can resurface old bad memories as well… Perhaps that was the plan all along? For me to realize how much pain, bitterness and heartbreak I’ve been hiding and let fester in my heart. Or perhaps it’s just what a hurting heart does — because it can’t hold it all anymore… So it overflows the pain and breaks into pieces.
But the Lord takes those pieces and ..
Even with the sun shining; even with all the lights on in the house; you are still consumed by the darkness. Because this type of darkness invades the soul, the heart, the mind. This type of darkness leaves you with not even a window to climb out of. It has buried you 6 feet under ground.
And so you wallow in despair and self-pity and depression.
I know this type of darkness all too well. It disappeared the moment I was saved (the day I felt the Holy Spirit enter me) and it was gone for 4 wonderful years. And then grief brought it back in full force …
We have all been this flower before. Perhaps, you are her right now… Perhaps you are filled with bitterness, anger, resentment, hate. Perhaps you are thinking time will eventually heal you. Perhaps you think you’ll forgive one day, but Heaven forbid you forget. Perhaps you dream of the day you will be healed fully; filled with love, kindness, grace and mercy. Perhaps you dream of the day you won’t be a flower in a wasteland anymore and instead be a beautifully bloomed flower in the Garden of Eden…
It’s not fun feeling like you’re the only Christian woman in the room. But sometimes it’s just a prideful view of the world. You think you’re better than others, even other Christians. But that’s not true. You’re just as sinful in the Lord’s eyes.
But even still, you can feel like a flower in the wasteland; like a flower disappearing in the weeds; like you have been forsaken in the wilderness to be consumed by the evil, dark spirits of this world.
But maybe we need to be placed with the weed — the unbelievers — because they bring up …
LADIES… THIS ONE’S FOR YOU. Are you feeling like you’re all alone in the wilderness; perhaps a flower in a wasteland?
We are called to be different than the world. We are called to be women of the Word. We are called to be a light in the darkness; the salt of the earth; the disciples of the Holy One.
This calling may cause us to be cast out into the wilderness; the battlefield; the wasteland …
Sneak Peak of the Poetry
His Little Flower
The earth is overgrown
and the blades of grass look like thieves in the night;
like armed robbers under the moon…
It unsteadies my soul
but I have to remind myself I know
the One who protects me all the days long;
even when the sun is gone
But it’s hard… Keeping the faith
when those blades of grass catch your gaze
and the shadows dance deceptively,
twisting your mind in agony.
I know the devil prowls around like a lion,
so when the earth is overgrown like this,
how am I to see him coming?
It’s like the blades of grass are really
his legion of demons in disguise…
I shiver
as the wind wisps through my leaves and petals,
leaving me feeling naked and bare.
Night time is always scariest
even with the light of the moon.
It’s just enough light to ward off complete darkness,
yet also just enough to play games with your mind…
But after every night fall, comes a sunrise
and my lungs heave their first real breath
and I let out a sigh as my eyes adjust to the light of day.
But I remember, that evil can prevail even in the day,
so I do not let my guard fully down, for I must
always be on guard against the devil and his schemes.
And I must always keep the faith of the God who holds me…
For He does hold me in the palm of His hands
because I’m His little flower in these wastelands.
Resurrected
Growing up as a wildflower
She has seen many others be stepped on, all around her…
She always seemed to be the lucky one;
just missing the heavy steps
and the pain that threatens to come…
But then one day it happened.
She was squashed.
She felt as though she was on the verge of death
The world around her blurred
As she fell into a state of reverie…
* * *
Her mind awoke before her body
She gasped as she opened her eyes
She was alive… But how?
She has escaped death,
that she is sure,
how? she has no clue…
But then a whisper came,
barely audible,
just for her ears only…
“I have spared you from going down
to the valley of death
For you are a flower after my own heart;
you have My breath
But when you are weak
then I am strong
Thus I ask for your faithfulness
all the days long
And though I have spared you
I can easily let you go
To the place that chases you;
the place where all tears flow
So decide now
what you desire most
but if you choose resurrection
you are not the one to boast
Remember who created you;
who saved you from the end
By praising me through your growth
and all the love and grace you send.”
* * *
And so she’s alive
She has grown back fresh and new
Even if it’s for one more day…
She will praise her Creator
with her grace and love
and endless fragrance of gratitude
She will have mercy on those who’ve hurt her
She will forgive those who’ve stepped on her
She will pray for healing for all who are at the valley of death
She will thank Her Creator
for the lessons He’s imparted
to her tender, growing, healing soul.
Tangled Roots
Why have you placed me with the vipers?
Why have you placed me with the weeds?
Lord, why am I here?
I thought you planted good seeds?
“My dear, don’t be weary
Don’t worry about the weeds
You know I am with you;
I will provide you with all of your needs…
I know you must be uncomfortable;
This situation may not be what you want
But it is what you need, my child,
So you may turn away from Satan’s taunts…
If I chose to help you now
And removed the weeds from you too early,
I could risk uprooting you;
removing you from your faith completely…
I keep you planted until the day of harvest
So that you may fully bloom
And perhaps turn some weeds to flowers
For in my Kingdom, there is lots of room…
Thus, be happy, be joyful
Be glad, and at peace
Get to work, my child
Spread my love and do not cease.”
She’s A Flower In A Wasteland
She’s a flower in a wasteland
Beauty surrounded by the dead;
Growing and shining through the evil;
Never leaving words unsaid…
She’s A Flower in a wasteland
Rooted to the Lord, our God
Praying for all the withered flowers
To sprout their way through the sod…
She’s a flower in a wasteland
Blooming all the days long
Through brimstone, fire and rain
She stand unbothered and strong.
The Lord Almighty’s Little Rose
A delicate little flower
Scared of being torn
She places herself in a sanctuary
Made of thistles and thorns
As she grew
She felt safe as could be
But as she bloomed
She noticed everybody would flee
Little Rose cried
as the rain poured down
Then she heard the wind whisper
“Please don’t frown…
Instead of trying to protect yourself
Allow me to hold you like clay;
Allow me to do your defending
Just trust in these words I say
I know it can be scary
To surrender your life to me
I promise you’ll be safe;
I promise you’ll feel more free”
* * *
And with that, Little Rose, shed her thorns
Smiling at the birds and the bees
She bloomed bigger than ever
Allowing all of creation to see
That she’s not just a delicate flower;
She’s no longer scared of her foes;
She’s comforted knowing she is His:
The Lord Almighty’s Little Rose.
Rainfalls of Restoration
Her petals wilt to the ground
Parched by faithlessness
As she slowly becomes devoured
By the ways of the wasteland around her.
She thirsts for the living water;
for rainfalls of restoration.
And with godly sorrow she prays
As her soul aches for tears to flow.
But she is parched
From the disease of hopelessness
As she becomes consumed
By the world around her…
And just as her vision was going dark,
A little light pierced through;
The light of the Lord has come
To mend her rotten roots brand new.
“I have heard your prayer,”
She heard the Lord say,
“I have come to restore
not only your wilted petals
but your aching soul, too.
I know it is rough
living in this wasteland all alone.
But I have crowned you with honour
For the works of My splendour.”
And with that the Lord was gone,
Leaving a rainfall in His place.
The rain drenched her wilted petals;
Quenching her parched soul.
He restored her back to new
So she could bloom and blossom with love
Spreading His grace and mercy and joy
To the lost flowers in the wasteland.
Bitter Roots
Bitterness has taken root,
breaking through the walls of her heart.
It grabs hold, planting itself there permanently.
Anger, resentment and hate
have been the causes of this bitterness
And revenge is beginning to bloom.
This bitterness is like a parasite;
Like a sickness or disease;
Like a poison invading her soul.
These bitter roots are holding her captive
They’re planting her in the wasteland;
They’re not allowing her to forgive and forget.
Will she ever be able to heal?
Will she ever be happy or joyful?
Will she ever be free again?
“Time will heal me,” she says,
“Soon the bitterness will go away.
Soon I will forgive, but never will I forget.”
But she is wrong.
Time cannot heal her wounds
Only the restoring balm of God’s grace can do that.
Only God can deliver her
From her parasitic bitterness
For He wishes for her to be free.
Only God can help her
To forgive AND forget
For He has the power to wash the memories away.
God wants her to be free;
God wants her to be healed;
God wants her to have roots of grace.
He wishes for His grace
To take root in her heart
Instead of the bitter roots causing her harm.
His gracious roots would heal her;
They would bring breath and life
And a garden of fruits for her spirit.
But will she accept this new fate?
Will she surrender her pain to the Healer?
Will she allow her heart and soul the breath and life she righteously deserves?
Will she break free from the wasteland?
Will she allow herself to grow in the love of Christ?
Will she allow His grace to take root?
Will she allow her bitter roots to be healed?
